Today was one of the bad day of my life, I was struggling all day just to feel free of all burdens. The fight between heart and mind is probably the oldest and most unresolved fight in the history, you don't know what you really want to do and what you are really doing. The heart is pulling you in one direction whereas mind is saying you you to do just opposite. The struggle of making a choice between heart and mind makes you a complete mess and in most of the cases you end up hurting yourself and hurting someone very close to you. most of the time there are some side effects as well...
Today, I ended up hurting someone who is very close to me, broke my professional etiquette and for the first time shouted at one of the student who eventually ended up in tears, was not able to give my 110% in class, and in the end I am have nothing but feel of guilt.
After all this, at the end of the day I am still not sure which side I am going. Probably people have seen best of me, but not some are seeing worst of me, and I am standing totally helpless to do anything about it. Every time when I gets into any big trouble, I always look for some peace in any secluded place like temple or close to nature and try to find answers and I usually get the right answers, but this time all I am getting is a blank. I am a fighter and straggler who never gives up so easily, but this time I feel like giving up on very first step.
2 comments:
Life does test u at times... what's imp is not that u pass the test but how u give it a fight...
I've never seen u so troubled... But as I had said, its just a phase... Its sure to pass... All we need is some patience & faith...
my comment was long due, I wanted to make sure that I give you honest response...
I am back in fight, with a great confidence... and I am gonna pass the test :)
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