How life sucks...

06/01/09- My project is in last stage of completion!!!
06/02/09- There are two minor corrections suggested, hoping to fix them in couple of days.
06/04/09- While working on the corrections lab computer is attacked by viruses, trying to get through this matter.
06/06/09- While fixing viruses, I realized that I am no more able to log in the normal mode.
06/08/09- Lab computer is crashed, though I have all back up ready with me.
06/09/09- Trying to work on my laptop, but it seems its not supporting that files.
06/10/09- New OS is installed on my laptop, but still same problems exists.
06/11/09- Talked to some of the experts in the field, they have no clue whats going on with my laptop and lab computer, no solution
06/12/09- Last hope is gone

Result- I am suppose to graduate in 1 month or so, still not started writing my thesis. Project is in the black hole, and I am totally clueless.

ज़र्रे मैं उसी का नूर है, झाक ख़ुद में वो न तुज से दूर है,
इश्क है उस से तो सब से इश्क क, इस मोहब्बत का यही दस्तूर है

I was listening some of the Delhi 6 songs while waking towards my lab, then suddenly voice of Amitabh Bachchan came up with the words that I have mentioned above... what a voice! It is one of those voices that I can never forget in my life. It reaches out to heart and make us believe on it. Couple of days back, I was reading an article about Amitji and it tells about I he was rejected from everywhere because of his voice and looks, and now looking at the present time it is one of the most respected voice in country.

It is really hard to understand how time changes and life shows new colors. At some point of time you are a total failure and at some other time you are leading the world. It all depends upon your hard work, attitude and little bit of luck. History is full of the examples like Amitabh Bachchan who started from being 'nothing' and ended up with being 'everything'. The common factor in all of them was some driving force that keep on pressuring them to do something to reach the higher orbits of their life. I am not sure where is my 'force', but it looks like its time to find it out and start something that I really want to do.

Love it or Hate it!

Its 3 AM and like any other day I am in my lab working on some project module and simultaneously watching a movie to keep me up. Its been after a while that I am feeling close to work and trying to focus more and more towards research. The truth is, after a long time I am facing a good challenge and this time with approaching deadline the research work look like going towards dead end, but I know that I will not let it happen.

For last couple of years, I have noticed that with increase in work load, my involvement in other stuff also increases. This time again, I am enjoying my evening send volleyball, occasional table tennis, blogs, photography and movies. This things help me to keep momentum towards work, just keeping my finger crossed to get over this module which has became the most prior thing in my life for now. Sometimes I love doing all the work and some time I hate it like hell, its too hard to understand these two opposing feelings and when I focus more and more about thinking over it, I go towards zero and all scattered thoughts start to flow in my mind (just like right now, I don't know what I am writing and why I am writing this blog). But I must confess, I enjoy this state because its very unusual of me and it help me know a new person in self.